In some way e-motions are “energy in motion.” When used creatively they can motivate us to achieve wonderful things in life. When repressed they can leave us characteristically bored with life, feeling empty within, and settling for cheap counterfeits.

For instance, when the emotion of love is repressed, more often than not it will express itself in lust and lead to superficial relationships. When anger is repressed it can come out as hostility, rage or passive aggression. When fear is repressed it can cause us to setting ourselves up to fail, or express itself in phobias. Instead of facing the real fear within, we attach it to something outside ourselves—it feels a whole lot safer to do it this way.

Or take the emotion of wonder. It’s the emotion that puts sparkle into life and makes life wonder-full. When wonder is repressed, our life is wonder-empty. It then expresses itself in a “lust” for things; that is, materialism. Instead of loving people and using things we end up unhappily loving things and using people to get more things.

I believe one of the major reasons why we in the Western World are so materialistic and “worship the god of materialism” is because so many of us are emotionally repressed and our lives wonder-empty.

A vital part of a truly wonderful life consists of being in touch with and aware of our entire range of God-given emotions; that, in turn, express themselves in wholesome, loving relationships with our own self, others, and ultimately with God.

Jesus said it well when he said, “A man’s life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions.” And as Henry Van Dyke said, “What you possess in the world will be found at the day of your death to belong to someone else. But what you are will be yours forever.”

Suggested prayer: “Dear God, please help me to get in touch with and be aware of all my God-given emotions and use them as You intended, so that my life will be truly wonder-full and so I will not be caught up in the emptiness of materialism—and so that my life will be a clear channel through whom Your love can freely flow to others. Thank You for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully in Jesus’s name, amen.”

1. Luke 12:15 (NIV).

There are two serious diseases of the mind that most, if not all of us, will encounter at some time. These diseases have been the cause of ineffectiveness and the death of innumerable churches, organizations, businesses, individuals and nations!

They can afflict the young but mostly those who are above 40. The symptoms are often obvious to outsiders but usually totally oblivious to those inflicted with either of these diseases.

The first disease is “homeostatus” which is a clinging to the status quo with a refusal to change no matter what. The ancient Israelites suffered from this disease when God delivered them out of slavery in Egypt. When things got tough on their road to “recovery,” they doubted God and wanted to go back to Egypt. Crazy, you say, but that’s what they wanted. As the saying goes, “Better the devil you know than the one you don’t know!”

The other disease is “psychosclerosis,” a hardening of the attitudes. This disease is equally destructive. Its symptoms can be varied such as legalism, rigidity, arrogance, apathy, Phariseeism, having a closed mind and so on. It is just as deadly as homeostatus.

We need God’s wisdom and insight to guard against these crippling diseases. They are two of the enemy’s powerful weapons designed to render us ineffective in God’s causes.

The remedy? Daily commit and trust your life and way to God, know what his Word, the Bible, teaches and genuinely seek to live in harmony with his will. Ask God every day to keep your eyes open and keep you on the “Truth Road.”

Suggested prayer: “Dear God, please deliver me from the mind diseases of homeostatus and psychosclerosis. And in the words of the song writer: ‘O Lord please light the fire / That once burned bright and clear / Replace the lamp of my first love / That burned with holy fear.’ Thank You for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully in Jesus’s name, amen.”

1. Paul, in Romans 12:11 (NIV).

Dale Carnegie writes, “If only the people who worry about their liabilities would think about the riches they do possess, they would stop worrying. Would you sell both your eyes for a million dollars … or your two legs … or your hands … or your hearing? Add up what you do have, and you’ll find that you won’t sell them for all the gold in the world. The best things in life are yours if you can appreciate yourself.”

Years ago when I was a student in Chicago driving a city passenger bus in the summer, I was greeted by a very refined elderly woman passenger who tapped me on the shoulder and said, “Young man, you’re a millionaire!” That was news to me. However, after a pause, the lady continued, “You have your health!”

She was right. Counting our blessings, as Carnegie suggests, is not going to take away our problems but it certainly can help us handle them much better—especially if we daily give God thanks in every circumstance—good or bad.

It also helps me when I am worried or stressed to write down all the things I have to take care of and list them in order of priority and try to tackle just one thing at a time. But the best antidote of all is to pray and tell God that I am scared and am worried, but I choose to trust him to help me work through the things that have me worried. In time my feelings catch up with my choice to trust God.

Suggested prayer: “Dear God, I commit and trust my life and way to You afresh this day. Here are my concerns [spell them out to God one by one]. Help me to see things as they really are. I surrender them all to You and choose to trust You to help me work through each one. Thank You for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully in Jesus’s name. Amen.”

1. 1 Thessalonians 5:18.

As Robert Edwards said, “Don’t place too much confidence in the man who boasts of being honest as the day is long. Wait until you meet him at night.”

I recently heard a man trying to convince his acquaintances how honest he was, which reminded me of the time I heard another man arguing about how humble he was.

When I hear statements like this I can’t help but think, “If I have to convince you I’m a gentleman, you can be pretty sure that I’m not. If I have to tell you how humble I am, already I’ve lost it. And if I have to repeatedly tell you I’m being honest, it’s probably a good sign that I’m not. As William Shakespeare so eloquently put it: “The lady doth protest too much, methinks.”

I don’t have to talk to lie. I can do it through my body language and facial expressions. I can lie by smiling or being saccharine sweet when I’m angry, by laughing when I’m hurting or sad, by being aggressive when I’m afraid, and so on. I can lie just through my tone of voice, or by pretending that I’m feeling or thinking something that I’m not.

Friends who don’t speak the truth cannot be trusted. You can’t feel safe or comfortable in their company. You’ll never know where they stand or where you stand with them.

As the Apostle Paul encouraged us: “We will lovingly follow the truth at all times-speaking truly, dealing truly, living truly—and so become more and more in every way like Christ who is the head of the body.”²

Suggested prayer: “Dear God, please help me to be open-faced, genuine, authentic, and real—always—and be like Jesus in all my relationships. Thank You for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully in Jesus’s name. Amen.”

1. Proverbs 10:18.

2. Ephesians 4:15 (TLB).

Chuck Colson tells about one prisoner he met who had been on death row for fifteen years. His name was John Irving.

John was allowed out of his cell for only one hour a day. The rest of the time he was studying to become a minister—preparing to serve God.

Noticing that John had nothing in his cell but a few books, Colson offered to give him a TV.

“Thanks,” John said, “but no thanks. You can waste an awful lot of time with those things.”

Can you imagine wasting time on death row?

Colson goes on to say, “The real evils of the entertainment industry are not the violence and profanity—offensive though they are. No, it’s the banality: the sheer waste of time. When we turn the TV on, we turn our minds off; studies have shown that the analytical areas of the brain nearly shut down during extended TV viewing.”

Suggested prayer: “Dear God, without going to extremes and ignoring TV altogether and/or becoming a workaholic, may I learn to use my time wisely, including quality time with my loved ones and making time to take proper care of myself with adequate rest and relaxation … and making time to spend with You. Thank You for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully, in Jesus’s name, amen.”

1. Ephesians 5:15-16 (RSV).

“I am a highly educated and capable man, but have been through the wringer for the past decade. I am completely overwhelmed with emotional burnout. I have come to the end of my rope and can understand why people drink themselves to death. I’m crying out for help.”

Dear James (name changed), I’m sorry to hear that you are feeling so down. Sometimes life can feel totally overwhelming. I’ve been there. About 25 years ago I sat where you sat and at 2 A.M. one morning when I was pacing the floor in desperation I prayed to God, “OK, God. You win. I don’t know what you are trying to say to me through my circumstances but I can’t go on. You can have our new office and home [a home that I had built with my own hands that overlooked the city of Adelaide, Australia, and the ocean beyond]. You can have everything I own. I will go anywhere in the world if you will just give me peace.” Then I added, “P.S. But God please don’t send me to Alaska because I hate the cold!”

I think God must have a sense of humor as today I am living in Southern California with a wonderful climate and have an even better view of the ocean. However, my recovery didn’t come overnight. I needed lots of counseling to work through and resolve my inner conflicts and failures, but today my life has never been more productive or more fulfilling.

The major turning point for me was when I literally begged God to confront me with the reality of what I was contributing to the conflict situation I was in. Once I saw this (my super codependency), I knew exactly what I needed to do. This is one of the most powerful prayers I have ever prayed.

I suggest that you pray the same prayer. Ask God to confront you with your reality no matter how much it hurts. This can be very painful but it’s only as we see what we are contributing (and we all contribute something) can we see what we can and need to do. While we can’t always change our circumstances, and never change other people, we can always change ourselves and our attitudes.

I also urge you to seek capable professional counseling. At times like these most of us need someone outside of ourselves to help us see what we are contributing to the situations in which we find ourselves and to help guide us on the sometimes rocky path to healing and recovery.

Suggested prayer: “Dear God, in all of life’s adverse circumstances please help me to hear what You are ‘saying’ to me so that I can grow and become a healthier, happier and more mature person. Thank You for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully in Jesus’s name, amen.”

1. James 1:2-4 (NIV).

Yesterday in answering Jamie’s question on how to forgive her mother who had died, we discussed her need to express her pent-up negative emotions of hurt and anger to make forgiveness possible. One way to resolve her anger was to write to her mother as if she were still alive and express these feelings to her.

Another way to resolve anger is to go for a drive in your car, park in a safe place, turn your radio on fairly high, and talk to your mother as if she were right there in the car with you, and express all your hurt and angry feelings to her. You may also need to do this a number of times.

Another way to get your anger off your chest is (when you are home alone) to sit down and place an empty chair in front of you and pretend your mother is sitting in that chair and express all your hurt and angry feelings to her—or read your letter to her.

If you feel you can’t do this or that you might go out of control, I suggest that you see a qualified, professional counselor* who can help you to get all of your painful feelings off your chest. Once you are confident that you have done this, forgiveness becomes much easier and is a choice … so tell your mother you forgive her.

Remember too, as William Walton put it, “To carry a grudge [unforgiveness] is like being stung to death by one bee.”

One more suggestion. It may help to do what I once did. After resolving most of my negative feelings towards my father whom I felt had rejected me, I went alone to his graveside and sat there for a couple of hours “talking to him” as if he were alive. This, too, I found to be very freeing.

Suggested prayer: “Dear God, thank You that You have created me with emotions that put sparkle into life. Please help me to find a safe way to express all my negative feelings and to freely forgive any and all who have ever hurt me as You have freely forgiven me for all my sins and failures—so I can move on to live a full and productive life for Your glory. Thank You for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully in Jesus’s name, amen.”

1. Ephesians 4:26-27 (NLT).

*NOTE: If you live in North America you could telephone the Narramore Christian Foundation for the name of a Christian counselor in your area. Call 1-800-477-5893 and press “1″ for Mary and she should be able to help you. Or go to www.actsweb.org/counseling_resources.php for counseling resources.

A Daily Encounter reader asks, “All my life I felt rejected by my mother who blamed me for her having a stroke when she was pregnant with me. Now she has passed on so how can I forgive her?”

Dear Jamie (name changed), forgiving someone who has passed away is not as difficult as it may seem. First, you need to get in touch with the emotions that unwarranted blame and rejection causes. You can be certain that you will have a lot of hurt and anger that needs to be expressed to make forgiveness possible. Unresolved resentment makes forgiveness impossible.

Your hurt needs to be wept or sobbed out in all of its intensity from the pit of your stomach. With such intense pain it is usually advisable to do this in the presence of a capable counselor or counselor-led support group. You need to imagine in your mind that your mother is present and you are expressing these feelings to her. Remember that tears are God’s gift to drain the pain of intensely painful memories.

There are several healthy ways to express your anger. You can write out your feelings. Pretend that your mother is alive and write a very personal letter to her. Don’t worry about correct spelling or grammar, just write … write … write out all your angry feelings in all their intensity. Tell your mother exactly how you feel and why you feel this way. You may need to do this several times until you no longer feel angry at her. Also, read each letter to God and ask him to help you release your anger so you can forgive your mother.

You are not doing this to hurt her (which you can’t) or to hurt anyone else but to get these self-destructive emotions off your chest so you can be freed to forgive her and in so doing be free to fully live and fully love.

To be continued …

Suggested prayer: “Dear God, please help me to get in touch with all of my unresolved negative emotions and find a safe way to get them off my chest so I can genuinely forgive all who have ever hurt me. And then help me to let go of the past so I can move ahead to live a fully productive live. Thank You for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully in Jesus’s name, amen.”

1. 1 Peter 2:1 (TLB).