Former President Ronald Reagan, in an interview with Dr. James Dobson, reported in Focus on the Family magazine, said, “I don’t believe you can have a strong, healthy nation without the family unit as its very base. As the family goes, so goes the nation.”²

Dr. Nick Stinnett, chairman of the Department of Human Development and the Family at the University of Nebraska-Lincoln, agrees. He believes that history clearly illustrates the relationship between the strength of families and the strength of nations.

“As we study some of the ancient cultures such as that of Egypt, Rome and Greece,” says Stinnett, “we see a common pattern: When these cultures were coming into the peak of their power and glory as nations, the family was strong. It was important and was valued very highly. Family members cooperated with one another. They depended on each other.

“Then, as these nations progressed along their paths of destiny, the family came to be not so highly valued, the culture became extremely individualistic. It was a ‘do your own thing’ philosophy to an excessive degree. The families deteriorated. When that happened, the societies themselves fell.”³

The family shapes the nation because it shapes the lives of those who make up the nation. It is within the family that we either gain or fail to gain our sense of belonging, our s-e-xual identity, and our sense of self-worth. The family also teaches us values and how to relate to other people.

When these basic needs for belonging, acceptance, self-worth, and training in wholesome values and relationships are not adequately met, the seeds of juvenile delinquency, alcoholism, drug abuse, impaired relationships, marriage breakdown, divorce, homosexuality, depression and mental illness are sown. And the more of these problems we have, the weaker our nation becomes.

Because as a nation we are so dependent on the strength of our families, we need to do all in our power to develop stronger, healthier homes.

Being concerned with what makes families healthy, Dr. Stinnett led a major international research project to learn the secrets of strong families. His studies included strong black, white, ethnic, and single-parent families in North America, South America, Switzerland, Austria, Germany and South Africa.

To be continued …

Suggested prayer: “Dear God, please help me in my family life to live in harmony with the principles as found in your word and thereby set an example for my family members. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully, in Jesus’ name, amen.”

1. Colossians 3:19-20 (NIV).

2. Focus on the Family, November 1985, p.3.

3. Rekers, George, Ed., Family Building: Six Qualities of a Strong Family (Ventura, CA: Regal Books, 1985), pp. 36. © Logos Research Institute, Inc.

Richard Halverson, former chaplain of the US Senate shared the following message in one of his monthly report letters some time ago:

“Sinners enjoy authentic fellowship. Saints don’t.

“People who pose as saints aren’t free to remove their masks. Under pressure to project conventional piety, they are unable to open up and share themselves.

“Upholding the traditional religious image, they remain invulnerable in human relationships because they dare not expose their real selves.

“They major in propositions rather than persons. They share their victories but never their failures. They congratulate one another in their little mutual admiration societies.

“Meeting head to head instead of heart to heart, they protect themselves against discovery, and ricochet against each other like marbles.

“The authentic saint is oblivious to his sainthood, is deeply aware of his unworthiness, sensitive to his failure, and confesses that he is a sinner.

“Which makes possible true fellowship.

“Sinners acknowledge their inadequacy, lean heavily on God’s grace, and identify quickly with need in others.

“Recognizing that all men are sinners and are unwilling to hide from the truth, they share their weaknesses, confess their sins to one another, and do not fear vulnerability.

“They come together like grapes, crushed and fragrant, dependent upon each other and God.”

As the Bible puts it, “God is light, and in him there is no darkness at all. If we claim to be sharing in his life while we walk in the dark, our words and our lives are a lie … But if we walk in the light as he himself is in the light, then we share together a common life, and we are being cleansed from every sin by the blood of Jesus his Son. If we claim to be sinless, we are self-deceived and strangers to the truth. If we confess our sins, he is just, and may be trusted to forgive our sins and cleanse us from every kind of wrong.”²

Suggested prayer: “Dear God, please help me to be real with myself, with trusted friends and, above all, with you so that I will be an authentic Christian—and always walk in the light. And grant that others seeing Jesus in me will want him for him or herself. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully, in Jesus’ name, amen.”

1. 1 John 1:9 (NEB)(NIV).

2. 1 John 1:5-9 (NEB)(NIV).

“Researchers at Kenyon College conducted a test in cooperation with the US Navy. The purpose was to discover how the tone of the voice affected sailors when they were given orders. The experiments revealed that the way a person was addressed determined to a large extent the kind of response he would make. For example, when an individual was spoken to in a soft voice, he would answer in a similar manner. But when he was shouted at, his reply came back in the same sharp tone. This was true whether the communication was given face-to-face, over the intercom, or by telephone.”²

With yellers there is a tendency to yell back at him or her. However, other research has shown that if we answer a yeller softly in a soft tone of voice, he will have to lean forward to hear what we are saying and tend to lower his own volume—proving the truth of what the Bible taught so long ago: “A gentle answer turns away wrath.”

Richard De Haan wisely said, “What we say and how we say it not only makes a difference in the reaction we’ll receive, but it also determines whether conflict or peace will result. Many arguments could be avoided and tense situations relaxed if we understood [and practiced] this truth.”

Suggested prayer: “Dear God, please help me in all situations to remain calm and peaceful and learn always when I speak, to speak the truth in love. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully in Jesus’ name, amen.”

1. Proverbs 15:1 (NIV).

2. KneEmail Mike Benson, Editor. 4bens@sigecom.net

On a lighter note, I believe it was Charles Colson who expressed a simple but profound tongue-in-cheek truth when he shared, “Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There’s too much fraternizing with the enemy.”

In Western culture (at least) tremendous emphasis is placed on physical beauty. There’s nothing wrong with being beautiful and keeping ourselves attractive, but if that’s what controls our life and is a cover-up for insecurity, we will be left very empty inside—and even more so as the years take their toll on our body.

Sophia Loren says that “beauty is how you feel inside, and it reflects in your eyes. It is not something physical.” Sure that was easy for Sophia to say with her incredible physical beauty, but what she said was true. Better said, it would be, “True beauty is what you are inside.” If we are only loved for our physical beauty, we will never feel truly loved because that is not the real person.

As Saint Exupery said, “It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.”

Ralph Waldo Emerson put it this way, “Though we search the world over for the beautiful, we find it within or we find it not.”

Furthermore we can only ever be loved to the degree that we are known—and that has nothing to do with our external appearance, but all to do with our inner being.

According to God’s Word, “Charm can be deceptive and beauty doesn’t last, but a woman [or man] who fears and reverences God shall be greatly praised.”²

Suggested prayer: “Dear God, please help me to be a beautiful person on the inside and so live that the beauty and love of Jesus will show and shine through me. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully in Jesus’ name, amen.”

1. 1 Samuel 16:7 (NIV).

2. Proverbs 31:30 (TLB)(NLT).

Fascinated by the conduct of flying geese, Dr. Robert McNeish, wrote “Lessons From Geese” for a sermon in his church in 1972. Demonstrating the power of a good idea, his essay spread and has become a classic statement of the importance of teamwork.

Fact: As each goose flaps its wings, it creates “uplift” for the birds that follow. By flying in a “V” formation, the whole flock adds 71 percent greater flying range than if each bird flew alone.

Lesson: People who share a common direction and sense of community can get where they are going more quickly and easily because they are traveling on the thrust of one another.

Fact: When the lead goose tires, it rotates back into formation and another goose flies to the point position.

Lesson: It pays to take turns doing the hard tasks and sharing leadership. As with geese, people are interdependent on one another’s skills, capabilities and unique arrangements of gifts, talents or resources.

Fact: The geese flying in formation honk to encourage those up front to keep up their speed.

Lesson: We need to make sure our honking is encouraging. In groups where there is encouragement, the production is much greater. The power of encouragement (to stand by one’s heart or core values and encourage the heart and core of others) is the quality of honking we seek.

Fact: When a goose gets sick, wounded or shot down, two geese drop out of formation and follow it to help and protect it. They stay with it until it dies or is able to fly again. Then they launch out with another formation or catch up with the flock.

Lesson: If we have as much sense as geese, we will stand by one another in difficult times as well as when we are strong.

Fact: When a goose falls out of formation, it suddenly feels the drag and resistance of flying alone. It quickly moves back into formation to take advantage of the lifting power of the bird immediately in front of it.

Lesson: If we have as much sense as a goose, we stay in formation with those headed where we want to go. We are willing to accept their help and give our help to others.²

Suggested prayer: “Dear God, please help me to know what my God-given gifts are, develop them, and use them to work in harmony with others to help do your work in your church here on earth. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully, in Jesus’ name, amen.”

1. 1 Corinthians 12:5-7 (NTL).

2. Cited on Character Counts www.charactercounts.org. For verification of the author see research by Sue Widemark at: http://suewidemark.com/lessonsgeese.htm.

Most readers will be aware of “computerese” language that has developed in relation to computers, email and the web. Words, or letters rather, with specific meanings such as: HTML, FTP, PDF, CSS, LOL, RSS, GIGO etc., etc. GIGO stands for “garbage in garbage out.” That is, if we put garbage (nonsensical information) into our computer we will get nonsensical information out of it. It’s the same with life.

For instance, you may have read the story about the mother who was cleaning and slicing vegetables for a salad when her daughter came into the kitchen to ask permission to go to a movie—one with sufficient rating to indicate that it had “adult” language and other material offensive to Christians.

“All the kids are going,” she said, “and their parents don’t think it will hurt them.”

As she talked, she saw her mother pick up a handful of the scraps and throw them into the salad. Rather startled, she shouted, “Mother, you’re putting the garbage into the salad!” “I know,” her mother replied, “but I thought if you didn’t mind garbage in your heart and in your mind that you wouldn’t care about a little in your stomach.

Thoughtfully, the girl picked the peelings from the salad and then smiled at her mother. “I guess I’ll just tell them I’m staying at home tonight,” she said as she went through the kitchen door.²

The world we live in is plagued by evil and moral filth. As Christians a vital part of living a happy, meaningful and fulfilling life is, as God’s Word instructs us, “turn away from evil and do good.”

Suggested prayer: “Dear God, please give me the insight to immediately recognize those things that are morally wrong and the good sense to turn from them. Help me to maintain a pure heart and live a life that is pleasing to you. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully, in Jesus’ name, amen.”

1. 1 Peter 3:10-11 (NLT).

2. Chuck Webster, “Protecting Our Minds,” The Words of Truth, Vol. 42, No. 4, April 2005, Ted Burleson, editor.

A Daily Encounter reader writes, “In a recent daily devotional you talked about free will vs. predestination. Do you think that it is predestined by God whom we marry?”

Dear Anita (name changed), one way to think of predestination is as follows: imagine that your life here is like being on a train. Because you have accepted Jesus as your Savior the train you are on represents God’s overall plan for your life. God is taking that train all the way to your final pre-determined destination which is heaven. However, while on the pre-destination train, you have free will to choose to stay in one carriage or move from carriage to carriage … you can eat at which eating places you choose … dress the way you choose … sit with whom you choose … choose which educational classes you will attend … choose what kind of work you want to do and are best equipped for … choose which church you attend … make friends with whom you choose … and marry whom you choose.

In all of life’s choices if we genuinely seek God’s will, he will give us guidance, wisdom and direction, but he won’t violate our free will and make our decisions or choices for us. If he did, he would be keeping us over dependent and immature. With many of life’s options we need to choose wisely because we will reap the benefits/consequences of the choices we make—be they good or bad.

Because God’s gift of forgiveness of sins and his invitation to heaven is to “whoever will may come” we can choose to board the “train” that is predestined for eternal life in heaven. Or by default we can choose to stay on the “train” that is predestined for eternal death and separation from God, the author of all love and life.

So whatever you do, choose today which “train” you are going to board. For Help see “How to Know God and be sure you’re a real Christian without having to be religious” online at: http://tinyurl.com/real-christian.

Suggested prayer: “Dear God, thank you that you have given me the choice to accept your forgiveness for all my sins with the gift of eternal life in heaven. This is what I choose. Please help me to do this. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully, in Jesus’ name, amen.”

1. Proverbs 3:5-6 (NIV).

Mark Twain said, “The difference between the right word and the almost right word is the difference between lightning and the lightning bug.”

When English poet Keats was writing a poem he asked his friend Leigh Hunt what he thought of the line, “A beautiful thing is an unending joy.”

“Good, but not quite perfect,” said Hunt.

“How about this?” said Keats, “A thing of beauty is an unending joy.”

Finally Keats put it this way, “A thing of beauty is a joy forever.”

“That,” said his friend, “will live as long as the English language is spoken.’

When God speaks he always has the right word. Sometimes his words are difficult to understand. Other times they are incredibly simple but extremely profound. The following are some examples: “Love one another,” “God is love,” “I am the bread of life,” “I am the vine, you are the branches,” “I am the door,” and so on. His first word in the Bible is about as straightforward as anyone could make it. It simply says, “In the beginning God.” His last word or message as the Bible closes is just as simple and just as profound: “I am coming soon!”

May God help us to always speak the right word? It doesn’t have to be eloquent but it needs to be straightforward, genuine, and spoken in truth from the heart! God put it just right: “Speak the truth in love.”

Suggested prayer: “Dear God, please help me to say the right thing at the right time and always speak the truth in love—and keep my mouth shut when I need to. Always. Even when I’m ticked off. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully in Jesus’ name, amen.”

1. Ephesians 4:15 (NKJV).

It goes without saying that God created mankind for relationships from which comes 80 percent of life’s satisfaction. To live meaningfully is to be in meaningful relationships, without which life is lonely and leaves us with an empty “love tank” or vacuum in the heart.

If we don’t know how to relate in healthy ways, we don’t know how to fully live and fully love. As a result we can impair our mental and physical health.

God himself is in relationship through the Holy Trinity and Jesus started the Christian movement with relationships: “He [Jesus] appointed twelve … that they might be with him”² Christ’s entire ministry was done in relationship with his twelve disciples, apart from his dying on the cross to bear the penalty for our sins. This he had to do alone.

As a Christian, our first need is to maintain a right relationship with God by confessing our sins, making right our wrongs, and living in harmony with his will. Trying to live the Christian life without this is like trying to go east by traveling north.

We then need close, connected relationships with people. Only then can we realize some of the deepest longings of the human heart. The reality is that we need people. Barbara Streisand sang it well: “People who need people are the luckiest people in the world.” People who say otherwise are living in denial.

Furthermore, the degree of our mental health, emotional maturity, and physical and spiritual well-being will be reflected in the health or otherwise of our closest relationships. God’s command to “love one another” is not a sentimental suggestion. It’s an imperative—not for God’s sake but for ours.

Suggested prayer: “Dear God, please help me to resolve any and all impaired relationships I may have. Help me also to live in harmony with your will so that I will have healthy relationships with myself, others and above all with you. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully, in Jesus’ name, amen.”

1. Genesis 2:18 (NIV).

2. Mark 3:14.

A study conducted some time ago by sociologist Steven Nock of the University of Virginia showed that couples who attend church regularly are 42 percent more likely to be married for the first time, and those in the church who were strongly committed to its beliefs had a 23 percent better chance of having a “very happy” marriage than those who don’t go to church.

Furthermore, according to a report by Warren Mueller, where both parents attend church regularly, 72 percent of their children continue in the faith. Where only the father attends, that percentage drops to 55 percent, but where only the mother attends, just 15 percent of the children remain involved in the church.

People then who have happy marriages and strong families are those who are committed to making their families strong. They work hard at communicating effectively. They spend time together. They express love and appreciation. They accept crises as normal and know how to work through them, and above all they trust in God and apply their faith to everyday living.

Need I say more?*

Suggested prayer: “Dear God, please help me to always put you first in my life and live in harmony with your will and what your Word teaches so that (whether married or single) I will have a productive and fulfilling family/friendship life. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully, in Jesus’ name, amen.”

1. Hebrews 10:25 (NIV).

*Adapted from the article: “What a Good Church Can Do for You” at https://learning.actsweb.org/articles/article.php?i=117&d=1&c=10&p=1