In response to a recent Daily Encounter on homosexuality a concerned subscriber asked for any suggestions that I could offer to help her talk and witness to a friend of hers who had chosen a lesbian lifestyle.

I didn’t have a clear-cut answer, but here’s what I suggested:

I don’t think situations like this ever have a simple, pat answer. I certainly don’t have any such advice. And while I don’t want to sound too simplistic, I think it is very important that we ask God to help us to be as Jesus to all questioners and to give us the right word at the right time.

A girl, whom I will call Mary, attended one of my weekend seminars on “Loving and Understanding People.” A participant asked about homosexuality and I expressed what God’s Word had to say about it and added that, at least for some, its roots can go back to childhood which can cause a woman to unconsciously be searching for the mother love she never received, and where a man may still be searching unconsciously for the father love he never received. Mary was extremely upset with me. In no uncertain terms—in front of the entire group—she declared in no uncertain terms that I was “a pharisaical religious b——!”

This was quite a shocker to say the least. I simply answered, “Sometimes I probably am.” It turned out that Mary was a lesbian.

To my amazement Mary turned up a few weeks later at a week-long, live-in workshop we had for those who wanted to work on unresolved personal issues. There were about 25-30 people in attendance. In this entire week not one person condemned or judged Mary. Early in the week I told Mary that while I didn’t agree with her lifestyle, I loved and accepted her for whom she was. In fact, the entire group loved and accepted her and by the end of the week she even gave me a very warm hug and said, “Maybe you are right.”

All too often it is a lack of love that drives people into acts of sin as they search for their unmet love need in all the wrong ways and places. And only love will ever bring them out again—that is, God’s love through us. True, we are to hate the things God hates, but at the same time we are to love the people God loves. And while God hates sin of all kind, he loves sinners of every kind. We need to do likewise because we all qualify as sinners.

Suggested prayer: “Dear God, before I ever point a finger at anyone else, please confront me with any unresolved issues and sinful ways in my life. And help me always to love fellow sinners—and be ‘as Jesus’ to them—even when I see their sinful and self-destructive ways. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully, in Jesus’ name, amen.”

1. 2 Timothy 4:2-3 (NIV).

It is a fact of life that our lifestyle affects our life and that of our families.

Alcoholism, for example, affects millions of families and individuals. It tears families apart and is terribly damaging to children in their developmental years when they have a parent or parents who are alcoholics. It causes innumerable crimes including rape, physical and sexual abuse, murder, robbery and maimed lives and slaughter on our highways.

According to an article in Moody Monthly, homosexuals account for half the nation’s cases of syphilis, even though they represent only a small percent of the population. The reason? Promiscuity. Homosexuals are also the principal victims of AIDS and other infectious diseases, and are fifteen times more likely to commit a murder. And according to the EP News Service, the U.S. government spends more on AIDS research than it does on heart diseases. This is in spite of the fact that cardiac disorders claim forty times more deaths than AIDS.

And Pulpit Helps reports that 30 percent of all cancer deaths are related to smoking. There is also a 70 percent greater risk of heart disease among smokers than among nonsmokers.

God has a sound reason for all of his laws—including the ones that apply to the sins of the spirit such as emotional dishonesty, jealousy, envy, malice, hatred, resentment, greed, lust, an unforgiving spirit, and so on. All of these are damaging to the body as well as to the spirit just as much as cigarette smoking, and perhaps even more damaging. It’s good to keep this in mind when we judge other sinners. Whatever it is that we sow, that’s what we reap. That’s the law of the harvest. And God never goes against his own laws.

Suggested prayer: “Dear God, help me to realize that all of your laws are for my protection and that of my loved ones. And please help me to abide by them so that I can lead a healthier, happier life and be a good example for my children and my children’s children. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully, in Jesus’ name, amen.”

1. Galatians 6:7 (NIV).

About two decades ago a teenager asked me the question: “Do you think homosexuality should be legalized?”

Regardless of what I thought at the time, much of our culture has come a long way since then in accepting homosexuality as “an alternate lifestyle.”

True, everybody has a right to decide for themselves whether or not homosexuality should be legalized or accepted as an alternate lifestyle. What I did in this instance was share what I believed God’s Word had to say about the subject. “According to God’s Word,” I answered, “homosexuality is an unnatural condition² It is listed with various other sins which are all destructive to human personality, and as such are opposed by God.”

The Bible also says that God will forgive all who confess their sins, but indicates that those who willfully practice sexual immorality, idolatry, adultery, male prostitution, homosexuality, stealing, greed, drunkenness, slandering, and swindling will not inherit the kingdom of God.³

If God is opposed to these damaging behaviors, can we justly justify or legalize any one of them? The reason God is opposed to these actions (and all other sins) is because they are harmful to those whom he loves—us. Furthermore, it has never been proven that homosexuality is in one’s genes any more than pedophilia is. And if they are, perhaps sin, too, is in our genes because we are born with a sin nature. But would that justify sinful acts? In fact, there are usually deep psychological causes behind many of these external “acts of sin.” The causes often have their roots in the past and need to be confronted if a person is to find wholeness, healing and recovery—emotional and spiritual.

If we justify and legalize any act of sin, we harm the person involved much more than we ever help him. It gives him/her an excuse not to confront and resolve his/her problem.

As Christians we are to accept and love the sinner and not judge or condemn him (because we are all sinners and are probably all guilty of at least greed, gossip, or slandering which are listed in God’s Word along with the sin of homosexuality).This doesn’t mean that we accept, excuse, or approve anyone’s sinful behavior (including our own). Very often it is a failure in love in early childhood that “drives” people into some acts of sin. Only love, Christ’s unconditional love through us, will ever draw these people out again.

Suggested prayer: “Dear God, please help me to always accept what you say and not yield to the pressure of so-called political correctness. Help me to take the beam out of my own eye before trying to take the splinter out of another’s eye. And like you, while I oppose all sin, please help me to love the sinner unconditionally and thereby help draw him to you for your healing grace, forgiveness, and victory over his sinful behavior. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully, in Jesus’ name, amen.”

1. Romans 6:23 (NIV).

2. Romans 1:27

3. 1 Corinthians 6:9-11

How do you know what God’s will is for you? Or how will you know if you are called of God?

Brent Porterfield, quoting from Frederick Buechner’s book, Wishful Thinking, provides an answer well worth pondering. Buechner “says that a good rule for finding one’s vocation is this: Our special mission in our life is usually one of the following:

A. That which we’d love most to do and

B. It is work that the world most needs to have done.

“Buechner says that if we really get a kick out of our work, we have probably met requirement A, but if that work is writing TV deodorant commercials, chances are we haven’t met requirement B. If our work is being a doctor in a leper colony, we probably have met requirement B, but if most of the time we are bored and depressed by doctoring, chances are we have not only bypassed A, we probably aren’t helping our patients much either.

“Buechner concludes: ‘The place God calls us to, is the place where our deep gladness and the world’s deep hunger meet.’”²

Oswald Chambers described God’s call this way: “The call of God is like the call of the sea to the sailor. Only he who has the nature of the sea within can hear the call.”

Like a born-sailor who never rests until he answers the call of the sea and launches out into the deep, when God’s Word is written in our heart, neither will we find rest until we do what we know in our heart what it is that God wants us to do. And when we answer that call, we too, like King David, will delight in God’s ways and doing his work—no matter how humble or noble that may be.

Suggested prayer: “Dear God, thank you that you have a plan and purpose for every Christian, and that includes me. Like David of old, please give me a love for your Word and your ways so that I, too, will know and delight in doing your will and answering your call on my life. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully, in Jesus’ name, amen.”

1. Psalm 40:8 (NASB).

2. Brent Porterfield, www.eSermons.com.

In his Sermon: “Didn’t You Hear What I Said?” Julian Gordy shared how, when he was in high school, “A physician came to talk to us about the dangers of smoking. He scared us with his grim pictures of smokers’ lungs and tales of death from lung cancer. The doctor finished his speech by saying, ‘Remember, fire on one end, fool on the other.’

“We were all impressed, especially those boys who would sneak out behind the shop building at lunch to light one up. But a couple of the guys saw the doctor himself lighting up when he got back in his car after the lecture. And his credibility was shot. He was the talk of the campus. It would have been better for the no-smoking campaign if he had never come to speak. Saying one thing and doing another is something nobody respects.”

Reminds me of the quote that goes something like, “Your actions speak so loudly I cannot hear what you say.”

Suggested prayer: “Dear God, please help me to so live that my life will always be a living example of integrity in that the life I live will be in harmony with what I believe and what I say. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully, in Jesus’ name, amen.”

1. James 1:22-24 (NIV).

I recall having read how, in the 1940s, 80 percent of all watches sold were made in Switzerland. In the late 1950s the digital watch was presented to them, but they rejected it because they already had the best watches and the best watchmakers. The man who developed it subsequently sold his idea to Seiko—and the rest is history!

In 1940 Swiss watch companies employed 80,000 people. Today, they employ 18,000. In 1940 they made 80 percent of all watches sold. Today, they make 20 percent—and the majority are digital! This story demonstrates what happens when an organization or an individual chooses to die or fade away rather than change.

While in the church our message of God’s love and his great gift of salvation never changes, our methods of ministry and communicating this message need to change with the changing times and the changing needs of people. What worked yesteryear may no longer work today. And if our methods no longer work, we need to discard them. Becoming product, method, or program oriented instead of being people oriented spells death to any ministry, organization, or business.

When Jesus came, he cut right across the grain of man-made religious dogma, programs, and traditions that were not relevant to the needs of the people of his day.

In his ministry he was always sensitive to the felt or perceived needs of his listeners and targeted his ministry to address those needs. As illustrated in his encounter with the two blind men his question was, “What do you want me to do for you?” To which they replied, “That we may receive our sight.” Before meeting people’s spiritual need, Jesus always ministered to an individual’s personal and felt need. For us to do less is being less than Christ-like.²

Suggested prayer: “Dear God, please help me always to be sensitive to the felt needs of people and help me to be as Christ to them and meet them at their point of need. In so doing grant that they will be drawn to and accept you as their Savior and Lord. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully, in Jesus’ name, amen.”

1. Matthew 20:30, 32 (NIV).

2. Adapted from the book, I Hate Witnessing, a Handbook for Effective Christian Communications by Dick Innes. Available from www.actscom.com/store/.

How well I remember when I first came to the U.S.A. how moved I was by the singing in chapel where I attended college and how, when I was fresh out of college, in the little church I attended how we made the rafters ring with our singing. Back then the singing was in rich, full harmony. Also, on one occasion when speaking in a church in Perth, Western Australia, the singing was heavenly. On the fist line of the first song, I said to myself, “Surely the presence of the Lord is in this place.” And he was.

There was a Chinese professor in the congregation that day. It was only the first or second time in her life that she had ever been to church. She told us how she was brought up in China under Mao Tse Tung and was taught that there was no God. “But,” she said, “I know now that there is a God. I felt his presence here as never before.”

In days gone by I used to play an electric guitar—but if I only ever played the melody, I’m pretty sure my family would have been “harping” (nagging) at me, especially Joy, my wife, for she plays both a harp and the piano. If she only ever played melody on the piano and on her harp, I’d probably be “harping” at her!

I may very well be wrong, but I cannot in my wildest dreams ever imagine that the singing in heaven will be without harmony. Harmony is a marvelous gift of God. As four-color printing is to color printing let’s bring four-part harmony back into our churches to enrich our worship and praise of God. And, if our schools are no longer teaching our kids music and harmony, let’s do it in our churches. And if our churches aren’t teaching music and harmony, let’s teach our kids at home. Like I said, harmony is a wonderful gift from God. Let’s use it to glorify him and enrich our singing and worship—regardless of whether we sing traditional hymns or contemporary praise songs.

1. Psalm 147:7 (NIV).

Amidst all the hoopla of political correct nonsense is the claim of those who deny that the holocaust ever happened, and the claim that some of the violent acts of recent times were not by Islamic terrorists.

As Chuck Colson pointed out a few short years ago in BreakPoint, some are claiming that, “‘We have no idea who flew those jets into the World Trade Center and the Pentagon.’ ‘I thought the videotape of Osama bin Laden and his cohorts celebrating their success was evidence enough,’ said Colson, ‘you know, the tape where they say that the attacks on America went even better than they’d expected.’”

There is also the denial of reality regarding the Islamic faith.

Colson continues: “Then there’s the program put together by scholars at my alma mater Brown University that will be taught at more than one thousand high schools. It’s called ‘Responding to Terrorism: Challenges for Democracy.’ Student readings emphasize that Islam ‘is a religion that values family and tolerance,’ and that ‘throughout much of history, Muslims have lived peacefully with followers of other religions.’ They did—but only after they conquered the Middle East, North Africa, and much of Europe in holy wars.

“The ‘Islam is peaceful’ message was recently reinforced at the University of North Carolina, when freshmen were assigned selections of the Qur’án—peaceful selections, that is. The parts about how it is the duty of Muslims to kill Jews, Christians, and other ‘infidels’—the parts about holy wars that are of vital importance in light of September 11—were somehow left out.”²

According to FoxNews.com last year copies of the Qur’án were placed on the doorsteps of 30,000 homes in southwest Houston. Could you imagine if an organization placed copies of the Bible on the door steps of 30,000 homes in a Muslim country?

True, not all Muslims by any means are terrorists or adhere to all that the Qur’án teaches regarding the killing of Jews and Christians. At the same time school kids and others are being led to believe that there is little difference between Islam and Christianity which is also a denial of reality. Yes, there are some similarities but at the core of both faiths they are worlds apart.

For instance, is the God of Christians and the Bible the same as Allah is to Muslims?

The Bible (as did Jesus) clearly teaches that God is a holy Trinity: God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit. On the other hand, Islam states that Allah is a unity, when in fact, to them he is a single unit. Thus Muslims emphatically deny the triune nature of God.

The Bible teaches: “In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. He was with God in the beginning. Through him all things were made; without him nothing was made that has been made. . . The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the One and Only, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth.”³ The “Word” refers to Jesus—the Word or “Expression of God” in the flesh.

The Qur’án teaches: “Far be it from Him [Allah] that He should have a son” (4:171). Thus Islam totally denies the deity of Jesus Christ.

“Others (Muslims included) are equally adamant in affirming that the Allah of Islam is NOT the God of the Bible.”

Jesus Christ, according to all true Christians is the Christ, Son of the Living God—our Lord, our God, and our Savior. To Muslims, while he is highly esteemed as a prophet of God, he is not the Son of God, is not part of the Triune God, and is not the Savior of the World.

According to Arab World Ministries, “Islam offers a conversion experience and the opportunity to get one’s life in order, without needing to confess one’s sin and need of salvation. In fact, Islam makes quite a point of denying these truths. It tells people they do not need salvation; all they need is to follow the ’guidance’ of God’s [Allah's] law, and they will make it to heaven.”⁴

The important issue at stake is that people need to understand the true teachings of both Christianity and Islam, not to criticize or condemn, but to be sure that they personally are on the path of truth and be sure of their eternal salvation. As Jesus said about himself, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father [God the Father] except through me.”⁵ If this is not true, then Jesus is not a great Prophet of God but a liar and a deceiver of mankind.

Tragically, politically correct nonsense that denies truth and reality will send people to hell.

Suggested prayer: “Dear God, in a world where there is a constant battle between good and evil, truth and lies, please help me to see the truth of who you are, who Jesus is, and your way of salvation. Give me the courage to always stand for Truth regardless of whether it is politically correct or not. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully, in Jesus’ name, amen.”

1. Luke 9:20 (NIV).

2. Breakpoint, August 23, 2002. See http://www.breakpoint.org.

3. John 1:1-3,14 (NIV).

5. John 14:6 (NIV).

A Daily Encounter reader requests: “Could you do a lesson on spiritual abuse in the church, please? Something about pastors who, rather than shepherding their flock, rebuke people into submission? And, like the Pharisees, know the letter of the law but not the spirit.”

Unfortunately, some legalistic leaders who use false guilt to control others do exist. When the early church slipped back into legalism, Paul asked them, “Who has bewitched [bedeviled] you?”²

People who have a need to control others, whether they are in the church or elsewhere, are very insecure and immature. They gain a sense of false security only when they feel that they are in control of those under or around them. While this is an emotional sickness, it affects those whom they control spiritually as well as emotionally, and can be psychologically damaging to them.

Furthermore, when leaders control others, they are playing the role of God and God’s Spirit in other peoples’ lives.

However, when we (as adults) allow ourselves to be controlled by others instead of yielding to the control or direction of God’s Spirit—and depend on others to tell us what we should or shouldn’t do—we act like children who need a parent figure for our own security. In so doing, we become a part of the controlling person’s sickness! This way we don’t have to think for ourselves, or accept responsibility for our decisions, and we can blame someone else for our bad choices. We do this because of our own insecurity and immaturity.

While we can’t change others, with God’s help we can change ourselves, and not allow others to control us or lord it over us! That is our responsibility.

Suggested prayer: “Dear God, thank you that I can depend on you and on your Word, the Bible, to show me healthy ways of living, worshipping, and relating to others. Help me to grow in maturity so I will not be a controlling person or allow myself to be controlled or ‘lorded over’ by others. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully, in Jesus’ name, amen.”

1. 1 Peter 5:2-3 (NLT).
2. Galatians 3:1 (KJV).