Monthly Archives: September 2012

Seize the Day

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“A spiritual gift is given to each of us as a means of helping the entire church.”1

“Motivational speaker Danny Cox tells about a ‘Broom Hilda’ cartoon in which her naive, innocent little friend Irwin puts on a long-tailed formal tuxedo jacket, picks up a conductor’s baton and walks into the woods alone.

“Irwin steps up on a fallen tree trunk and begins to wave his arms as if to conduct. There are no musicians, only rocks, trees and flowers. Soon, musical notes pour from the rocks, trees and flowers and fill the panel.

“Finally, Irwin turns and confidently says to the reader, ‘It’s all in there; you just have to work at getting it out.’”2

Michelangelo, the great artist, said, “I saw the angel in the marble and chiseled until I set it free.” That, my friend, is what God wants to do for you and me. Every one of us has gifts, abilities, and talents that God wants us to see, develop, and use in some way (large or small) for the betterment of others and the enrichment of mankind. Remember that God has a place for you and what you have to offer—no matter how small or large your giftedness may be—in his work in your world. There are no exceptions to this rule!

As Irwin said, “It’s all in there. You just have to work at getting it out.”

Suggested prayer: “Dear God, thank you for the gifts, abilities and talents you have given to me. Please help me to identify these, develop them and use them for serving you by helping others and therein help make my world a better place in which to live. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully, in Jesus’ name, amen.”

1. 1 Corinthians 12:7 (NLT).

2. Seize the Day by Danny Cox and John Hoover, Career Press, Hawthorne, N.J., 1994, p. 81.

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What is Real Love?

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“If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.”1

A Daily Encounter reader asks, “What is real love? It seems to me that some people who don’t claim to be Christians are more loving and non-judgmental than some Christians I know.”

Dear Sharon (name changed), unfortunately, just because someone claims to be a Christian doesn’t mean that they are a real or an emotionally mature person. It is also true that some non-Christians are more loving and non-judgmental than some Christians because they are more emotionally mature. However, it is important not to determine what love is by human standards but by God’s standards.

The best definition of real love is found in the Bible in 1 Corinthians, chapter 13. It probably would be wise for all of us, including myself, to memorize this entire chapter so it becomes a vital part of our inner belief system. This would definitely help us to act in a loving manner.

As God’s Word says, “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.”2

Thus real love is unconditional; that is, it is love without strings attached. It doesn’t have hidden motives for loving someone. When one gives love it is always gratifying if that love is returned, but real love loves regardless of the response of the other. It always has the other’s best interest at heart—and this sometimes calls for tough love.

The Apostle Paul also noted in this masterpiece on love, “When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me.”3 In other words, real love is the fruit, perhaps the highest fruit, of both emotional and spiritual maturity. So to grow in love we need to keep growing in both emotional and spiritual maturity.

Suggested prayer: “Dear God, please help me to keep growing in spiritual and emotional maturity so that my life will always—in all circumstances—reflect the heart of a truly loving person and therein bring glory to your name. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully, in Jesus’ name, amen.”

1. 1 Corinthians 13:1-3 (NIV).

2. 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 (NIV).

3. 1 Corinthians 13:11 (NIV).

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Bonding

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“Don’t be misled: ‘Bad company corrupts good character.’”1

The first connection every child has is with mother. It starts in the womb and as the newborn child is in his or her mother’s arms (and especially on her breasts) that connection or bonding is reinforced. Unfortunately, the child who doesn’t have healthy bonding in those early years is being programmed for life-long problems unless he goes through recovery. If the child feels no bonding at all, he can die.

Connection and bonding in loving relationships are essential for our entire lifetime. We cannot live healthily without this kind of relationships. As counselors tell us, we cannot not be bonded. Thus, if we are not bonded in healthy ways to healthy people, we will be bonded in unhealthy ways. For example, some people stay in very unhealthy and toxic relationships for fear of being isolated and not connected to someone. Others, if not bonded to people, may be bonded to their work, gambling, drugs, alcohol, sex, or material possessions and so on.

Healthy bonding needs to be a priority of every individual and should be available in every family and every church. If you can’t find it where you are, look for a healthy church where you can get connected in an open, honest, support group. Or find it with some open, non-judgmental healthy friends. If necessary, find it in a recovery or twelve-step group. Healthy bonding and connection to healthy people is essential for healthy, wholesome, and meaningful living.

As the Bible reminds us, the company we keep affects our life.

Suggested prayer: “Dear God, please help me to find at least one safe soul-brother/sister with whom I can be totally open and honest, connected, and bonded in a healthy way, and in so doing help me to stay connected and bonded to you. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully, in Jesus’ name, amen.”

1. 1 Corinthians 15:33 (NIV).

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Good News for Jerks

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“Instead, we will speak the truth in love, growing in every way more and more like Christ, who is the head of his body, the church. He makes the whole body fit together perfectly. As each part does its own special work, it helps the other parts grow, so that the whole body is healthy and growing and full of love.”1

I’m sure you’ve heard or read about the book authored by Thomas Harris, I’m OK–You’re Ok, that was published some years ago. A humorist adapted it to say, “I’m not okay–and you’re not okay–but that’s okay.” I read an even funnier suggestion not so long ago where an author said he would like to write a book and title it, I’m a Jerk–You’re a Jerk (although he used a much stronger word than jerk).

This wasn’t intended to put people down, but to realize that it is such a liberating experience when we admit what we are, because only then are we free to change.

The reality is that everybody at times feels insecure and not okay. And it’s okay to feel this way. Once we admit it, then we don’t have to quit living and pretending as if we don’t feel that way. It’s called being authentic.

It starts with courageous honesty and admitting who and what we are. On one occasion in a support group I was leading after a comment I made to a lady she retorted, “Innes, you are a j with an erk.” So I replied, “You’re correct. Sometimes I am a jerk.” That’s a fact. If I get defensive and deny it, I will never improve, but if I admit this and all my faults, which, by the way is vital for self-acceptance, I am then free to grow and improve.

When we are truly honest with ourselves and learn to love and accept ourselves as we are, warts and all—the way God loves and accepts us—we gain a much healthier sense of self-love and self-acceptance. Realizing however, that while God loves and accepts us as we are, he loves us too much to leave us as we are. His goal is that we not only become followers of Jesus but that we grow to become whole and mature in every area of life.

Suggested prayer: “Dear God, please help me to see myself as you see me—warts and all—and learn to love and accept myself as you love and accept me so that I am free to grow and become more and more like Christ in every area of my life. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully, in Jesus’ name, amen.”

1. Ephesians 4:15-16 (NLT).

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Perspective

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“Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other.”1

An American visitor in England was driving with a British friend who made a remark about the windscreen of his car needing to be cleaned.

“You mean the windshield, don’t you?” said the American.

“No. Over here, we call it the windscreen,” the Englishman said.

“Then you are wrong,” the American corrected, “because we invented the automobile and we call it a windshield.”

“That is quite true,” countered the Englishman, “but don’t forget who invented the language.”

All of us see things through the lenses shaped and colored by our background. That is, from our perspective. If we would only realize this, many of us wouldn’t be as dogmatic as we sometimes are.

In conflict situations or where there is a difference of opinion we need to say, “This is the way I see it,” and then ask the other person, “And how do you see it?” Not always, but often the truth is somewhere between the two. Remember, too, it is a very insecure person who is dogmatic, never wrong in his own eyes, and consistently has a neurotic need to be right.

Suggested prayer: “Dear God, help me to remember that I always see things from my perspective and that others see things from their perspective. Help me always to be willing to look at and genuinely consider others’ point of view, and be ready to see and accept the truth regardless of my personal opinion. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully, in Jesus’ name, amen.”

1. Romans 12:10 (NLT).

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Enthusiasm

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“And a certain Jew named Apollos … being fervent in spirit [enthusiastic] spoke and taught diligently the things of the Lord … who, when he was come, helped the believers greatly.”1

Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “Every great and commanding moment in the annals of the world is the triumph of some enthusiasm.”

Enthusiasm is a wonderful gift but the type that doesn’t have deep roots can, when the trials of life seem overpowering, quickly fizzle out.

There’s another kind of enthusiasm that can survive the deepest trials of life and motivate great souls to soar above the winds of adversity to achieve noble and worthwhile goals.

The word “enthusiasm” itself comes from “en-theos.” “En” meaning “in” and “theos” meaning God. The word literally means “in God” or “inspired of God.”

Thus true enthusiasm is that which has its roots not in human inspiration but in God. This enthusiasm is available to all who genuinely want it when they seek God and his will for their life with all their heart.

Suggested prayer: “Dear God, please help me to be so committed to you that I will find ‘the great enthusiasm of life’ that has its roots in you. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully, in Jesus’ name, amen.”

1. Acts 18:24-27 (Paraphrase) (NLT).

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Tact

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“A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver.”1

When President Gerald Ford was in office, he was on one occasion visited in the White House by Queen Elizabeth and Prince Philip. When the Ford’s son, Jack, was dressing for a formal dinner with the queen and prince, he couldn’t find the studs for his shirt so he rushed into his father’s bedroom to see if he could borrow some.

He ran into the elevator with his shirt unbuttoned and hanging out and his hair disheveled—too late to discover that somebody else was already in the elevator. It was his parents with their guests, Queen Elizabeth and Prince Philip.

Mrs. Ford, feeling awkward, introduced Jack to their distinguished visitors. Sensing Mrs. Ford’s embarrassment, the queen remarked sympathetically, “I have one just like that!”

I used to have one at home something like that too. In time, I learned to keep his door closed and my mouth shut! Sometimes it’s what we don’t say that can say the most and be the most tactful.

Tact and kindness are great gifts to use every day. Indeed, “A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver.”

Suggested prayer: “Dear God, please help me to guard my tongue and learn to say the right thing at the right time, for the right reason, in the right way, with the right motive. Help me, too, to know when to seal my lips and keep my mouth shut. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully, in Jesus’ name, amen.”

1. Proverbs 25:11 (NKJV).

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The Search for Happiness

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“Then he [Jesus] said to them, ‘Watch out! Be on your guard against all kinds of greed; a man’s life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions.’”1

Some time ago “former Tyco executive Dennis Kozlowski walked out of a Manhattan courtroom and into a swarm of photographers. He had just been convicted on multiple counts of looting Tyco of hundreds of millions of dollars.

As Chuck Colson wrote, “I have an idea that at the peak of Kozlowski’s wealth and fame, he found his life empty and meaningless. I did when I rose to great heights of political power. According to researchers … a growing body of data points to the conclusion that the amount of money accumulated above middle-class comfort level has no impact on our happiness. They found instead that it’s social interaction and friendships that give us lasting pleasure in life.”2

Amazing isn’t it? Modern research is now agreeing with what Jesus taught 2,000 years ago. Furthermore, God’s Word repeatedly emphasizes the importance of relationships. One of the first things Jesus did at the very beginning of his earthly ministry was to choose the twelve disciples “that they might be with him.” He reminded his friend, Martha, that it was more important to relate to him—in the way that her sister, Mary, was doing—than it was to work for him—as important as that was. A new commandment that Jesus gave all his followers was to “love one another.”

Jesus also pointed out that when we come with an offering for God and remember that we have an impaired significant relationship, we are to first resolve that relationship and then bring our gift to God.

It has been claimed that 80 percent of life’s satisfaction comes from satisfactory relationships. For happiness, yes we do need to have our basic needs met, and there’s nothing wrong with wealth if it is gained honestly and used purposely with healthy motives; but of far greater importance is that we not only find peace with God, but also peace with others by forgiving all who have hurt us, and resolving every impaired relationship as far as is humanly possible.

Suggested prayer: “Dear God, while not neglecting my work and responsibilities, please help me to sort out my priorities and develop and maintain healthy relationships, first with my family, then with friends, and also with strangers whom you bring into my life. And above all, please help me to love you with all my heart, and always put my relationship to you first in everything I am and do. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully, in Jesus’ name, amen.”

1. Luke 12:15 (NIV).

2. Chuck Colson in Breakpoint, July 19, 2005.

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Crippling Handouts

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“For even when we were with you, we gave you this rule: ‘The one who is unwilling to work shall not eat.’”1

Isn’t It Ironic? According to an article I read, “The food stamp program is pleased to be distributing the greatest amount of food stamps ever. Meanwhile, the Park Service asks us to ‘please do not feed the animals’ because the animals may grow dependent, and not learn to take care of themselves.”

I couldn’t verify the validity of this statement; regardless, it is a fitting parable. With the way today’s government is handing out free welfare to so many irresponsible people is of great concern. True, we need to help those who want to help themselves but, because of the economy or a physical handicap, simply cannot find or are unable to work. On the other hand, as the Bible teaches, it is imperative that we do not help people who are “unwilling to work.”

The reality is if we feed animals in the wild, they can easily grow dependent on our handouts and neglect to take care of themselves. In so doing we help destroy them. It’s the same with people. And tragically, we know very well that all those who don’t want to work and know that they can get free handouts from the government will always vote to keep that handout government in power.

So it is imperative that you and I, the voters, keep the government responsible and elect only those politicians who have proven by their past record to be responsible. It’s not what they say that counts, but what they have done. The best proof as to what they will do in the future is to look at what they have done in the past.

Furthermore, you and I need to be responsible in how—and for whom—we vote knowing that a critical vote will soon be here in the U.S.A. Know all that you need to know about the ones you vote for, and exactly what they stand for based on what they have done in the past.

Suggested prayer: “Dear God, thank you that at least here in the U.S.A. we have the privilege to choose and vote for the leaders whom we feel will be the most responsible and the most trusted. Please help me to be responsible in the way that, and for whom, I vote. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully in Jesus’ name, amen.”

1. 2 Thessalonians 3:10 (NIV).

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Hope Springs Eternal

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“I know that my Redeemer lives, and that in the end he will stand upon the earth. And after my skin has been destroyed, yet in my flesh I will see God.”1

We can endure many trials in life as long as we have hope. Without hope, however, many people in seemingly hopeless situations give up and die before their time. Too many end up taking their life.

If anyone ever had a reason to feel hopeless it was Job. He lost his wealth, his health, and his children. His body, covered with boils, was racked with pain. His life had become a living nightmare. His friends said it was because of his sins and failures. He was so destitute his wife suggested he curse God and die.

Job had no idea that God was allowing Satan to test him. But through all his tests and attacks, Job never lost his faith in God. In the midst of his despair his soul cried out the profound words upon which Handel based his “Messiah.”

“I know that my Redeemer lives, and that in the end he will stand upon the earth. And after my skin has been destroyed, yet in my flesh I will see God.” Job instinctively knew that he was more than a body in that he was a living soul and that, in the end, he would see God.

We too, can have this same confidence and hope knowing that no matter what happens to us, by accepting Jesus Christ as our Lord and Savior, and trusting our life to God day by day, we too can have the hope and confidence that we too, like Job, will see God face to face and remain with him forever in heaven.

God’s Word promises, “And this is the testimony: God has given us eternal life, and this life is in his Son [Jesus Christ]. He who has the Son has life; he who does not have the Son of God does not have life. I write these things to you who believe in the name of the Son of God so that you may know that you have eternal life.”2 There is no greater hope than this in all of life. Do make sure this hope is yours. For help, read the article in No. 3 below.

Suggested prayer: “Dear God, help me to know you in a personal way, so that I have the assurance that all my sins are forgiven, and that I have the hope of eternal life when, like Job, I will see you face to face. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully, in Jesus’ name, amen.”

1. Job 19:25-26 (NIV).

2. 1 John 5:11-13 (NIV).

3. “How to Be Sure You’re a Real Christian” at: www.actsweb.org/christian.

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